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October 12, 2007

Clueless

Filed under: Bill Bickel, comic strips, comics, dating, Girls & Sports, humor — Cidu Bill @ 2:04 pm

clueless.gif
Okay, maybe I’m equally clueless — it’s been said before — but how is this guy “clueless” for taking this woman at her word rather than reacting to the mixed signals she’s giving him with her eyes? If anything, I’d think this sort of game-playing is even more reason to proceed with caution.

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12 Comments »

  1. I guess he’s supposed to know that a woman never means what she says*, starting with the word “no”. Hence, he’s clueless.

    *) According to a myth even some women buy into.

    Comment by Keera — October 12, 2007 @ 3:13 pm

  2. “how is this guy “clueless” for taking this woman at her word”

    Ummm…yeah. Haven’t been around long, eh?

    Comment by ctdonath — October 12, 2007 @ 7:13 pm

  3. Long enough to know that if you don’t take a woman at her word, you could be looking at a whole heap of trouble.

    Comment by Cidu Bill — October 12, 2007 @ 7:20 pm

  4. She’s blowing him off initially because she wants to be the one with “hand”, to quote the old Seinfeld episode. In any relationship, whoever cares the least has all the power – the upper hand. That was the whole point of that nasty old sexist book, “The Rules”.

    The only good thing about “The Rules” was that it was against women seeming too needy, and – although it advocated playing games – it taught women to have a spine and not be doormats. But the BAD thing about it was that a lot of men seem to fall ONLY for women who live by The Rules, and nice girls often finish last. Now if the nice girls and nice guys were EVER attracted to each other for a change…

    Comment by Laurie Wylie — October 13, 2007 @ 12:11 am

  5. Laurie, your comment gets a thumbs up from me. You understood the comic and added a nice point.

    I think another point to the comic is that he seems to be clueless even though when you read through the comic there aren’t any obvious clues unless you have experience in this situation, or at least have seen it enough on TV. If you read everything literally, she seems genuinely uninterested even though she is trying to elicit a response from him using her usual psychological methods that haven’t failed her before. I think the main joke here is just calling him clueless even though he’s playing the straight man.

    Comment by bAT L. — October 13, 2007 @ 5:54 am

  6. When it comes to courtship, the woman ALWAYS has the upper hand. As in most other species, it’s the female that chooses the male. The male pursues, struts his stuff, and goes through all kinds of courtship rituals, but he’ll get exactly nowhere unless and until the woman accepts him. Things would go a whole lot more smoothly if women would stop acting coy and hard-to-get and simply communicate their desires more clearly. We men aren’t mind-readers, as the comic illustrates quite handily.

    It always surprises me how few people of both genders realize this. A lot of the things men do that women complain about are really nothing more than tactics used to grab a bit more influence over what is actually a mostly-powerless position. There’d be a lot less game-playing if we men didn’t have to struggle so much to figure out what you women wanted from us.

    Comment by Altair IV — October 13, 2007 @ 8:57 am

  7. he male pursues, struts his stuff, and goes through all kinds of courtship rituals, but he’ll get exactly nowhere unless and until the woman accepts him.

    Yes, it’s all very tragic and unfair. After all, if a man doesn’t want a woman, she has so many different ways to force him into a relationship. My heart bleeds for these poor powerless men.

    Comment by Autumn Harvest — October 13, 2007 @ 1:26 pm

  8. I think it’s unfair to say that women ALWAYS have the upper hand. Remember, if you’re ever taking a true / false test, your safest bet is to mark the ones that say “always” or “never” as false, as there are exceptions to most any rule. I can’t say whether what you say is almost always the case or even almost never the case, but I’m sure not everybody fits into such a generalization. I’m sure there are some males out there for whom the females try to attract and are put on the defensive. Sometimes stereotypes exist for a reason, but they can’t be depended on and shouldn’t be used to categorize people.

    Comment by bAT L. — October 14, 2007 @ 6:34 am

  9. Yes, it’s all very tragic and unfair. After all, if a man doesn’t want a woman, she has so many different ways to force him into a relationship. My heart bleeds for these poor powerless men.

    Ahh, but you’re missing something here. In this case, the female has already made her decision to accept the man, should he ever desire it. She’s also, should she decide to *actively* go after him, breaking with tradition and putting herself in the male’s shoes as the pursuer (this is becoming more common nowadays, sure, but it’s still not the norm). And it’s at this point that you should start sympathizing with men, because its here that you can get a sense for the kind of frustrations that they have to go through constantly. But it’s amazing how often women think “pursuing a man” means simply putting on a sexy dress and arranging to “accidentally” bump into him after work, and hoping he takes the hint.

    Note also that I never said anyone had the ability to FORCE someone into a relationship. I’m just pointing out that the female traditionally has the final say in the matter. She also has more options, from complete passivity to man-like aggressiveness. But just ask any man how well being completely passive works out for them.

    And to answer bAT L, ok, maybe using “always” is a bit of a generalization/exaggeration, but as long as we’re talking about traditional male/female roles, it’s not much of one. The only real difference between me and Johnny Depp, say, is that he has more of what women are often attracted to, fame, wealth, and supernaturally good looks. It’s simply easier for him. But even he has to go through the motions if he wants to get anywhere. He has to do the asking out. He has to pay for the dinners. He has to make the moves. And at each and every point, he could blow it. It’s still her call in the end.

    (I could say a lot, lot more about this, but this really isn’t the right place. Sorry for stuffing up the blog with my rants.)

    Comment by Altair IV — October 14, 2007 @ 4:15 pm

  10. I think *she* is Joe.
    The guy’s obviously on a blind date that isn’t working out, and he’s trying to figure out the cheapest and fastest meal to order – look at how he’s studying the menu!

    He’s making bored, polite responses to her inane chatter and f*** me eyes, but she just doesn’t seem able to read the signs!

    Pete (been there!)

    Comment by Pete — October 14, 2007 @ 9:25 pm

  11. I think he’s clueless because he’s not even noticing her body language. If he were to look up from the menu and see her, he’d realize that she didn’t mean what she was saying.

    Comment by Madalch — October 15, 2007 @ 1:43 pm

  12. It seems to me it’s entirely possible she doesn’t want to be physical with him… but does he have to agree so readily? Not a hint of interest or disappointment? She might be trying to tease any emotional response out of him, but he’s just… clueless. Or apathetic, maybe he doesn’t find her attractive, because that’s the signal he’s sending.

    Comment by Katheryn — October 19, 2007 @ 5:57 pm


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